Sonnet 119
What potions have I drunk of Siren tears,
madness
error
ruin
return
What potions have I drunk of Siren tears,
Distill'd from limbecks foul as hell within,
Applying fears to hopes and hopes to fears,
Still losing when I saw myself to win!
What wretched errors hath my heart committed,
Whilst it hath thought itself so blessed never!
How have mine eyes out of their spheres been fitted
In the distraction of this madding fever!
O benefit of ill! now I find true
That better is by evil still made better;
And ruin'd love, when it is built anew,
Grows fairer than at first, more strong, far greater.
So I return rebuked to my content
And gain by ill thrice more than I have spent.
What It Means
Shakespeare has drunk poison — 'Siren tears,' distilled from alchemical stills. He has been mad. He wandered, made mistakes, suffered. But ruin is sometimes the only path back to the right thing. He returns to the young man better for the disaster, his love increased by the loss.
Context
Part of the Fair Youth sequence.
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